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Larry V. Pacoe, Ph.D.

Larry age 82, of the Squirrel Hill section of Pittsburgh, formerly of Forest Hills Borough, on Tuesday, February 2, 2021.  Cherished husband of 60 years to Mary (Stern) Pacoe; proud father of Gregory and Beth Pacoe (Fred Rapone); beloved Pop-Pop of Domenick, Maxwell, and Preston; and brother of the late Howard V. “Bud” Pacoe, Jr.  Larry also is survived by many nieces and nephews, cousins, friends, colleagues, students, proteges, and, of course, his grand-puppies Brody, Coco, Bear, and Tank, who will all miss the “weak link” at the dinner table.  Born April 24, 1938 in Butler, Pennsylvania, he was the son of the late Howard V. and Jean (Dumbaugh) Pacoe.  While a senior at Butler High School, Larry happened to be in the audience for its 1955 spelling bee.  One wonders what words and in what voice contestant Mary Stern spelled them, but Larry was L-O-V-E-S-T-R-U-C-K with her and soon thereafter the two (BHS Class of ‘56) would be forever and hopelessly in love with one another.  Larry graduated from the University of Pittsburgh in 1960; he and Mary were wed a week later; and the couple honeymooned in Forbes Field, cheering on the Pirates during that championship season.  Larry continued his studies, obtaining his master’s and doctoral degrees in psychology from Duquesne University.  For the next six decades, he dedicated himself to the cause of mental health, whether in private practice, scholarship, or teaching.  Larry trained and mentored countless students and residents as a faculty member at the University of Pittsburgh, its School of Medicine, and the Western Psychiatric Institute and Clinic.  Among his many professional achievements, Larry was particularly proud of his skill as a Cognitive Behavioral Therapist, spending 40 years of his career learning, implementing, and teaching this mode of therapy.  All was not work, however.  He and Mary shared a love of traveling and the arts.  He appreciated a well-prepared meal, the works of Sophia Loren, the Pittsburgh landscapes of Robert Schmalzried, and fine scotch (which he always shared).  And, while a steady Pirates, Steelers, and Penguins fan, he reserved his deepest sports passions for his beloved Pitt Panthers.  Larry and Mary relished the time spent with their circle of dear friends and he was a wonderful and engaging conversationalist.  Most of all, Larry treasured being with his family.  At home, poolside, aboard his boat, around the fireplace of the Hidden Valley house, or at his grandsons’ ballgames.  These were the best times.  Memories yet remain to be created, but Larry’s absence from these moments will not go unnoticed.  American humorist and Yiddish lexicographer Leo Rosten defined the term “mensch” as follows: “someone to admire and emulate, someone of noble character.  The key to being ‘a real mensch’ is nothing less than character, rectitude, dignity, a sense of what is right, responsible, decorous.”  Larry was such a person; “a real mensch.”

Arrangements

According to his wishes, he will be cremated, without visitation or religious ceremony.  The family anticipates holding a memorial service once COVID-related restrictions are relaxed.

Retirement had provided Larry with the time to reflect on and be grateful for the many blessings in his life.  In lieu of charitable donations, and in this spirit of gratitude, the family requests that you reflect on those who have provided your lives with meaning and then take the time to express your gratitude to that person or persons.

James F. Kutch Funeral Homes & Crematory
433 Lincoln Highway
East McKeesport, PA 15035
(412) 823-4054

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2 Comments

  • Flo Van Cara Posted February 7, 2021 9:19 am

    Dear Mary, I send my sympathy to you. I was sad to see that Larry died as I know how much you two loved each other. I have many fond memories of Larry–he was a wonderful person. I loved his humor. I send my best wishes for peace and comfort to you and all your family.

  • Ann Trageser Posted February 8, 2021 1:37 pm

    Dear Mary: I am so sorry for your profound loss. My deepest sympathy is extended to you, your children, and grandchildren. I did not know Larry, but he certainly was a man of many accomplishments. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.
    Ann

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Phone: (412) 823-4054
Fax: (412) 825-00210
East McKeesport, PA 15035
433 Lincoln Highway